I’m so excited. I think my wife has a lot to say that’s worth hearing in a world of people speaking loudly about nothing. I encourage her regularly to speak with me and write. She sent me this late Sunday night (Mother’s Day) and I think it’s worth sharing with you.
Ahh…Mother’s Day. I love Mother’s Day. I remember always loving it as a kid too. It was I and my sister’s turn to spoil my mom for one day, because Heaven knows we couldn’t have kept up the ‘no fighting’ rule for much longer than that! I remember making the macaroni art pictures that really only a mother could love, and doing my best to “keep the house clean.” It is still a mystery to me how a house can be clean when you go to bed, but by the time you wake up, it’s a disaster again…thus, I digress.
I recall part of Mom’s Mother’s Day was that she was not to do anything. We would wait on her hand and foot. Whatever she wanted, we would do. Well, that was from my perspective and our intention. I suppose she did plenty more than we thought since my attention span has never been long and I tend to whine when I don’t really want to do something.
Yes, I know my Mom had mercy on us.
I’m writing this while sitting on our front porch listening to the birds and enjoying the beautiful warm day God has given us. I have just finished a wonderful lunch that my amazing husband and boys made for me. I asked that this be the one day a year that I don’t have to make a decision, which I have not had to do, and I love it. I have peace and quiet.
Every Mom’s dream for a Sunday afternoon. Yet, I am unsettled.
I don’t really know what it is. I love the idea of having a ‘day off’ from being Mom. Not that I don’t want my kiddos around me, but just not having to do anything seems very appealing.
While I love the idea…it is really hard to accept.
You see, as I sit here on the porch swing, I know my beloved hubby and kids are cleaning up the dishes and kitchen from lunch. For some reason it is making me crazy not to go in there.
Don’t get me wrong, I am ANYTHING but a neat freak and cleaning the kitchen and doing dishes are not on my list of top 10 favorite things to do, but I feel bad. I feel bad because I feel like they are doing the job I should be doing. I know my husband has worked hard all week, including this morning, and the last thing I want him to have to do is cater to me.
There in lies my struggle. I know that he wants to wait on me and to serve me, but it is really hard to let him.
Why is that? Is it because I am a control freak and I want to make sure my kitchen is put back the way I want it when they are finished? Naw, as long as the dishes are clean when they go in the cabinet, I’m pretty happy with it.
Is it because I think they can’t do as good of a job as I can? Well, I’ve learned that even if they don’t do it the same way I do, it’s OK as long as it gets done.
Or, is it because when you’re a mom, you’re used to doing the little things that don’t seem like a big deal but if they don’t get done your world turns into chaos…laundry, dishes, sorting and throwing away junk mail, etc? Probably.
I think God is trying to show me something in all of this besides the fact that my family is AWESOME. I understand that I struggle with letting my ‘boys’ wait on me because I know it is inconvenient for them. I also know that I don’t mind doing it for them because I love them and as wife and mom it is one way I can show that to them.
I think He wants me to know that caring for me and meeting my needs is one way my family can show that same love to me. I know itsounds ridiculous that allowing someone to wait on me is a sacrifice, but it really is. Even though it is tough to not go in and help “just a little,” I know I need to let them do this so they can demonstrate their love to me, not just say they love me. This reminds me of another who had a little trouble being waited on by One that he loved.
The story of Jesus washing the disciples feet is one that I absolutely love. What a picture of service, humility and grace.
4 So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, 5 and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him. 6 When Jesus came to Simon Peter, Peter said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” 7 Jesus replied, “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but someday you will.” 8 “No,” Peter protested, “you will never ever wash my feet!” Jesus replied, “Unless I wash you, you won’t belong to me.”
Now I know this story has many applications, but I can so identify with Simon Peter’s response to the idea of Jesus, his teacher, master and Lord washing his feet. Peter loved Jesus and wanted to do anything for Him, but letting Him serve him was just too much.
Jesus made it clear that this simple act of love and humility had to be done in order for Peter to be called His. What a beautiful picture of grace and mercy. I know that allowing my family serve me is not imperative for us to belong to each other, but it is a chance for them to show me grace and mercy. For that I am both willing and grateful.
So for all the moms out there (or, anyone else) that have a hard time accepting service from your loved ones, remember this may the way they show you how much they love you, just as you have done for them. Let it happen and soak up all the love they are offering in their simple acts of grace and mercy.
2 Replies to “My Wife’s Mother’s Day Reflections”
Thanks Kat, I love it. It is so hard to sit still and let someone wait on me and I’m sure what I am doing is robbing someone of the joy of service! And I must confess that I am a bit of a control freak as to how it’s done. God is humbling me in this matter as I get older and ‘can’t do it all’.
This is so true Kat- Thanks for putting it into words. I go back to that verse,”It’s more blessed to give than to receive.” I can totally relate to this. I don’t usually take time to analyze why I am feeling the way I feel, but you have pegged it for most mom’s I think.